As writers and fellow creatives, facing our fears (see my post on fighting fear) is something we do almost on a daily basis. We may open ourselves up to rejection and judgment more than folks who work in your typical 9-5 office, but the truth is that everyone is judged no matter what profession you’re in. Today’s guestblogger is Dori Staehle, from the Raleigh area, who is an author, drum healer and speaker. She’s here to talk about facing your fear when speaking. Since I’ve known Dori I’ve been amazed by her energy, humor and optimism. If you’d like to get more Dori than what we’re offering on the blog today, please check out her new book, Find Your Divine Rhythm: A Creative’s Success Formula and sign up for her weekly newsletter.
Failure isn’t fun. However, it can be your best teacher. What I’ve learned is that failure is relative. It also isn’t permanent.
Shake it off—and get back up!
Everyone gets knocked down or messes up sometimes. The trick is to get back up. I’ve done some really good talks over the years. And I’ve done some where the train just got off the tracks or something happened that threw things off.
Even though messing up is embarrassing, you still need to get your gifts and talents out there. There is therefore only one solution: face your fears and get back on the horse. What happened is history. Shake it off—and get back up!
Go big or go home!
I recently did two presentations at a local Toastmasters group that unfortunately did not turn out as planned. It was so frustrating! Even though I’m an experienced speaker, I thought it would be beneficial to receive feedback from some really big players. I think I got psyched out and my plan backfired. I realized I needed a different approach and I needed to be myself.
Last week, I signed up to speak again. I converted my personal story into what could be a TEDx talk. Go big or go home, as they say. My thoughts shifted to the previous talks and nerves began to kick in. And there it was: “Cotton mouth.” I hadn’t felt that in years! I didn’t have a water bottle within reach but I decided to press on. I got my rhythm back and the talk began to flow better. Once I added drumming, I was in the zone. The talk wasn’t perfect but it totally worked. I got many thumbs up on the TED talk idea. I went home, took a deep breath—and signed up! Stay tuned!
In order to tackle a big dream, you have to do 5 things:
1) Visualize yourself doing it. Don’t skimp on the details. Replace the word “if” with “when” as in “When I get selected for a TED talk, I WILL wear a sequined top and black pants.”
2) Do your homework! I began researching TED talks featuring my topic: the healing power of music. What did these speakers bring to the table? What do I have that’s different? Who do I know who’s done a TED talk who might have some tips? I even Googled “What makes a TED talk go viral?”
3) Imagine all the people you can help by sharing your gifts or your story. God has a much bigger picture and purpose for you. Embrace it.
4) Enlist your support team! These are a few key people whom you trust, who get what you’re all about, and who are positive and encouraging.
5) Go for it!
What fear do you need to tackle? Feel free to leave your comment below.
Dori Staehle lives in the Raleigh, NC area and is the Chief Encouragement Officer and Rhythm Maker at Rock the Next Stage. She is an inspirational speaker, drum healer, percussionist, coach, and best-selling author. Dori has worked with hundreds of musicians and other creatives. Her TED talk will be based on her book, Find Your Divine Rhythm: A Creative’s Success Formula. It will include her personal story, case studies, therapeutic drumming research…and drumming. To contact Dori, click here.