Today I want to welcome my new guestblogger, Coach Olga Monroe of Raleigh, NC as she shares valuable tips on taming that Inner Critic! Welcome, Olga, and I look forward to having you guest blog again here at aliceosborn.com!
“When life turns upside down, stand on your head!” I frequently recall this quote from Bapsy Jain’s Luck Everyday. Luck Everyday is a story about the human spirit’s ability to adjust to the challenges that life throws our way. Throughout my life I have remained flexible and have adapted to my circumstances. Bravery, inner strength and resiliency give me the staying power to contribute to life and serve those around me. Staying power stands up to the Inner Critic that many of us carry within us. In this post I will share tips on how to battle your Inner Critic and keep your motivation going.
What is the most significant relationship, situation and/or challenge that you face? I suggest that you identify, name and objectify this obstacle. Visualize a physical object associated with this issue; name it (if there isn’t already one) and notice the physical sensation(s), in your body, when you experience this challenge. An example is that of guilt over an issue. Guilt is one of the most toxic inner critics. I visualize guilt as an old, nasty, smelly, worn out plastic object. Whenever I feel that nauseous sensation in my stomach associated with guilt, I say to the nasty object, ”I recognize your presence………..” Then there are many personal questions, comments and conversations that you may have with this object. For example, “I recognize your presence. What is it that you want from me? Why are you here?” Take time to breathe, quietly and intently. Allow yourself to listen. What do you hear? Give yourself the chance to stop and pay attention to what your senses are telling you.
Create awareness and objectify your situation. Then you have the power over the circumstances as opposed to the circumstances controlling you.
On a more positive note, what is working about your life? Make a list of blessings, give thanks and gratitude for these and draw on them as anchors.
Thankfulness, gratitude and appreciation of one’s blessings is one of the most powerful and therapeutic antidotes to the inner critic.
“A thankful heart turns sorrow into joy, drudgery into pleasure, pessimism into optimism, depression into hope, hatred into love. Thankfulness is a choice!” Gregory Mollner
The hardest, most challenging and disliked situations are the ones that we need the most. I call the negative voices that haunt, defeat and hold us back from our dreams, the Saboteur or Gremlin. The irony is that if the Saboteur is there, then that is the place in which we need to dig deeper. Confronting our Saboteur can be a formidable challenge, but what awaits us on the other side is our Higher Self. Once we identify the factors of this equation, the rest is a matter of regular and conscious practice.
Day by day, we grow beyond what we thought was possible for ourselves. Look back at circumstances a few months ago, one year ago and a few years ago. What were the state of affairs in your life? How do those situations relate to the present? Where is the learning?
There is a way for everyone to succeed, as long as we learn, grow and use each experience, there is the ability to receive and share the benefits of life.
The last suggestion I wish to make is to allow yourself to rely on a community for support. Remember that we are all part of a grand, evolving Universe. Drawing on friends, family and fellow like-minded people is a source of support, inspiration and love.
About Coach Olga
Olga is a Certified Professional Co-Active Life Coach & Mentor who passionately inspires and motivates clients desiring to realize and achieve their life purpose to their fullest potential through a system of perspectives. She encourages her clients to see the world and its many opportunities in a new way by learning to step fearlessly into their roles as leaders at work, in their family, and within the community. Contact her here or call her at 919-604-0104. Also visit her at ChicksWhoKnow.
Download Olga’s free Guided Meditation of Your Future Self now at http://www.yourrichesilluminated.com
Your Turn:
Tell us a time when you dealt with your Inner Critic and what happened.
Guestpost: Coach Olga Tames the Inner Critic
May 2, 2011 by 3 Comments
Today I want to welcome my new guestblogger, Coach Olga Monroe of Raleigh, NC as she shares valuable tips on taming that Inner Critic! Welcome, Olga, and I look forward to having you guest blog again here at aliceosborn.com!
“When life turns upside down, stand on your head!” I frequently recall this quote from Bapsy Jain’s Luck Everyday. Luck Everyday is a story about the human spirit’s ability to adjust to the challenges that life throws our way. Throughout my life I have remained flexible and have adapted to my circumstances. Bravery, inner strength and resiliency give me the staying power to contribute to life and serve those around me. Staying power stands up to the Inner Critic that many of us carry within us. In this post I will share tips on how to battle your Inner Critic and keep your motivation going.
What is the most significant relationship, situation and/or challenge that you face? I suggest that you identify, name and objectify this obstacle. Visualize a physical object associated with this issue; name it (if there isn’t already one) and notice the physical sensation(s), in your body, when you experience this challenge. An example is that of guilt over an issue. Guilt is one of the most toxic inner critics. I visualize guilt as an old, nasty, smelly, worn out plastic object. Whenever I feel that nauseous sensation in my stomach associated with guilt, I say to the nasty object, ”I recognize your presence………..” Then there are many personal questions, comments and conversations that you may have with this object. For example, “I recognize your presence. What is it that you want from me? Why are you here?” Take time to breathe, quietly and intently. Allow yourself to listen. What do you hear? Give yourself the chance to stop and pay attention to what your senses are telling you.
Create awareness and objectify your situation. Then you have the power over the circumstances as opposed to the circumstances controlling you.
On a more positive note, what is working about your life? Make a list of blessings, give thanks and gratitude for these and draw on them as anchors.
Thankfulness, gratitude and appreciation of one’s blessings is one of the most powerful and therapeutic antidotes to the inner critic.
“A thankful heart turns sorrow into joy, drudgery into pleasure, pessimism into optimism, depression into hope, hatred into love. Thankfulness is a choice!” Gregory Mollner
The hardest, most challenging and disliked situations are the ones that we need the most. I call the negative voices that haunt, defeat and hold us back from our dreams, the Saboteur or Gremlin. The irony is that if the Saboteur is there, then that is the place in which we need to dig deeper. Confronting our Saboteur can be a formidable challenge, but what awaits us on the other side is our Higher Self. Once we identify the factors of this equation, the rest is a matter of regular and conscious practice.
Day by day, we grow beyond what we thought was possible for ourselves. Look back at circumstances a few months ago, one year ago and a few years ago. What were the state of affairs in your life? How do those situations relate to the present? Where is the learning?
There is a way for everyone to succeed, as long as we learn, grow and use each experience, there is the ability to receive and share the benefits of life.
The last suggestion I wish to make is to allow yourself to rely on a community for support. Remember that we are all part of a grand, evolving Universe. Drawing on friends, family and fellow like-minded people is a source of support, inspiration and love.
About Coach Olga
Olga is a Certified Professional Co-Active Life Coach & Mentor who passionately inspires and motivates clients desiring to realize and achieve their life purpose to their fullest potential through a system of perspectives. She encourages her clients to see the world and its many opportunities in a new way by learning to step fearlessly into their roles as leaders at work, in their family, and within the community. Contact her here or call her at 919-604-0104. Also visit her at ChicksWhoKnow.
Download Olga’s free Guided Meditation of Your Future Self now at http://www.yourrichesilluminated.com
Your Turn:
Tell us a time when you dealt with your Inner Critic and what happened.
Guestpost: Writing for My Life
April 4, 2011 by Leave a Comment
Today we feature Guestblogger Gretchen Staebler who writes the blog “My View From the Garden.” Thanks so much, Gretchen!
Writing for My Life
“What would you do if nothing were standing in your way?” It is such an irritating question. Obviously there is a great deal blocking the way or I would be doing it; so what is the point of “what-iffing”? Irritation aside, my answer to the question has been, “I would be a writer.” I imagined myself in a tower room at the corner of my non-existent Victorian home, 360-degree windows looking into treetops; sitting at my desk typing away at novels that flow through my fingers onto the page. And, of course, the money flows as well, so I don’t have to “work.”
So, that’s not happening. 
I have come to realize, however, that there is great value in figuring out how to make dreams happen, even if not in the way imagined. When I bought my house with its renovated interior and overgrown, neglected gardens, I decided to try my hand at restoring the gardens. I am no more a gardener and landscape artist than I am a writer, but anyone can pull English ivy run amok, and that was the first task.
As I pulled ivy that first year I felt my body begin to loosen from the disappointments that had befallen me in recent years. I began to see the ivy as metaphor. 
As I ripped it out, I uncovered long buried plants that began to thrive and bloom again; and I found new life in myself. I dug up flagstone from long ago pathways and made new paths through the new garden areas I created; as I created new paths on the journey through my life. I became one with the seasons in the garden: the stillness of winter, the subtle entry from the darkness into spring, the over-the-top sideshow of summer, and the retreat of fall. And I couldn’t not write about it.
For the past dozen years I have occupied a corner café table every Saturday morning
to write in my journal. I began journaling about my learnings from the garden. The urge to move on from the verbal diarrhea that is my journal, and to share my thoughts with others became strong. But I didn’t know how. When, in a class with Alice Osborn, Alice mentioned blogging as a way to get ones writing out into the open, she lit a fire in me. It costs nothing; no one has to “approve” of what I write or how I say it; I didn’t have to figure out the publishing world. It really is just disciplined, intentional, public journaling.
I am a gardener because I garden; I am a writer because I write. But it is not the nouns that are important; what brings me joy these days are the verbs. I garden and I write. I write about the garden. I write about life. And I share it with the world, literally. A new reader in Mexico contacted me recently, having somehow discovered my blog. Now I read hers, as well. Perhaps it is these one-to-one connections that will one day save the world. Achieving world peace was not on my list of what I would do if nothing stood in my way, but you open a door and the world comes in.
I still write at the corner café table, only on a laptop now, instead of in a journal. Turns out I don’t need the Victorian treetop tower; nor do I need to support 
myself through my writing. The only thing that was standing in my way was me. And I stepped aside.
About Gretchen:
At the end of Lent 2007, on my own, I purchased a fully-renovated, 58-year-old, not-so-big house with over-grown, neglected gardens. Given little to do inside the house, other than put color to the beige walls, I have fallen in love with restoring the gardens to their former glory. As I learn about being a gardener and become aware of what is happening there, I learn about life. The passion for gardening is new. I recognized a passion for writing several years ago, but took it only as far as wishing I were a writer. The truth is, I have discovered in my maturity, we are what we do; and we can do what we are, no matter when we begin. I am a gardener because I garden; I am a writer because I write. May Sarton, writer of poetry, journals, and novels, said, “a poem is primarily a dialogue with the self and the novel a dialogue with others.” Perhaps the journal spans the gap. I write to understand myself, and I share it with you in the hope that it will spark you to engage in a dialogue with yourself and with others; and to join me in living with courage, with inner integrity, and with an open spirit. Here is my view of life from the garden.
Thank you, Gretchen, and your photography is gorgeous!
Your Turn:
What would you do if you if nothing stood in your way? Feel free to comment below!
Speaking Your Truth Book Review
September 30, 2010 by 4 Comments
Speaking Your Truth: Courageous Stories from Inspiring Women by Lisa J Shultz and Andrea Constantine
My rating: 3 of 5 stars
Reviewed by Guestblogger, Jane K. Andrews. Jane is a good, good friend of mine who is an accomplished poet, short story writer and trivia queen. Do not play Trivial Pursuit against her–you will surely lose.Speaking Your Truth, subtitled Courageous Stories from Inspiring Women, compiled by Lisa Schultz and Andrea Constantine, and illustrated by Janice Earhart, is the kind of collection I could give as a gift to several female friends. They would appreciate the first person accounts of other women who have overcome economic and educational deprivation, as well as substance abuse, spousal abuse, and what seems to be an epidemic of dissatisfaction with well-paying, but soulless positions in corporate America. Most of the women contributing to this book are listed at the end of their offerings as healers, coaches, spiritual directors, or artists of some stripe. Just the kind of people you might guess would take the road less traveled and then establish themselves as landmarks in the MapQuest search for fulfillment and self-actualization. Janice Earhart’s drawings at the beginning of each chapter are jaunty and engaging.
Our resident author Ginny Martin Fleming, who lives in Wake Forest wrote, “Royal Warrior Goddess.” This piece is about the author creating an inspiring image of a princess warrior goddess on a white plastic mask while she attended a women’s retreat. This mask symbolizes clarity, truth and compassion. We learn later on that Ginny suffered from chronic fatigue syndrome and fibromyalgia as a young mother. These diseases take their toll on their victims not only through insomnia, physical and mental pain, but also through social apathy. Usually the sufferer doesn’t look like she’s suffering, so many times, family and acquaintances might judge that the victim’s disease is “all in her head.” This only adds to the victim’s emotional pain. But through yoga, meditation, journaling and other healing practices Ginny was able to manage her condition. Ginny’s story is very personal yet universal. Through the details she recounts about her warrior goddess and the other trinkets, she reminded me of the many icons and do-dads I keep on my desk to help me create and write.
Despite the title, “The Power of Positive Thinking”, I found the content of Ginny Brannon’s story very inspiring. She reports life with her schizophrenic mother, being sexually molested, and the positive influence of her grandmother with a matter of fact understatement. She credits Norman Vincent Peale with her ability to look on the bright side and wring the best out of any situation, no matter how difficult. It seems to have worked well for her, and her experience resonates more effectively with a modern audience than anything by Dr. Peale. Ms. Brannon is a natural resources lawyer.
The other account I found especially affecting was “Knowing My Roots and Planting My Trees.” Kelly M. Calton’s meditation on how her small town, mid-western values inform her perception and practice in accounting, bookkeeping, and human resources seem genuine. She expresses a deep understanding of the trust and intimacy involved in dealing with other people’s finances.
Back to my female friends who might receive Speaking Your Truth from me for Christmas. For them, the example of women who can publicly own their recovery from various traumas, could provide just the nudge my friends have been waiting for. Somewhere in the six sections, ranging from “Self-Discovery” to “Faith and Spirituality”, to “Finding Your Own Path”, they will discover a familiar story with an empowered outcome. That story, I hope, and the authors and editors hope, will give the recipients the impetus to re-write their own stories with a happy ending.
View all my reviews
